Let’s Pause

by Tara Walls, a Doxa Counselor

In a world that is full of hustle and bustle, a need to constantly be moving and achieving, we must take time to slow down. After everything Covid took from us, the one good thing I will acknowledge is how the world was able to stop – even for a little bit. We were able to adjust with a new normal, (seemingly) one without high expectations and with much understanding. Many have shared stories about how the shutdown gave them space to do much self reflection and develop new habits, such as practicing self care. 

I would describe self care as a time set aside to honor and improve both mind and body. It is giving your system a break from its typical routine of things. It is welcoming rest and allowing growth to take place. Please be reminded that rest is important and can look different for everyone. We are to honor and dare I say, take pleasure, in rest. Making time for yourself is not a reward, but instead a need. Operating on fumes will not allow you to execute at your full capacity (however that may look). Working in overdrive will only lead to a breakdown – yes, mentally and even physically. 

Stress can lead to migraines, high blood pressure, heart attacks, and stomach issues –  amongst other things. If you notice you are not feeling well, ask yourself what may be the root of it. Do you need to slow down? Studies have shown there are many benefits of having a self care routine. Some of these include improving concentration, reducing anxiety and depression symptoms, managing stress, boosting energy levels, and improving self-esteem. Having a routine is not always necessary (or feasible), but allowing yourself something to look forward to can be beneficial. 

Forms of Rest / Self Care:

  • Working Out: This can look however you would like it to. Some hit the gym to ‘power off’ while others choose to be outside. Whatever you choose, the key is to not over do it – even a 30 minute walk will suffice. Remember, you are only in competition with yourself so there is no need to compare your journey to someone else’s. Do what your body allows. 
  • Reading: Just be mindful of what you are taking in! Reading allows you to check out of reality and be swept away into a whole new world. In doing so, please be careful of what you pick up. Choose something that will challenge you, rather than something that may trigger you. 
  • Scheduling Appointments: Scheduling appointments allows you to complete things you may have been putting off due to other ‘priorities’. I would take this a step further and encourage you to plan something to look forward to like dinner with a friend, catching a movie in theaters, or even booking a massage. Having something to look forward to feels like a reward at the end of a long and busy week. 
  • Saying ‘No’: audible gasp – Yes, saying ‘no’ is a form of rest! Just because you have space on your schedule does not mean you are available. Sometimes, it is okay to turn things down. You can’t be everything, all the time for everyone. Give your body a break and sit; allow your brain to rest. By doing this, you have relinquished any responsibility that you didn’t actually want and removes guilt for choosing what your body may have needed. 
  • Reducing Social Media: Numbing out by mindlessly scrolling is not helpful. It only leaves you wishing and dreaming about something someone else is portraying. What you can do is give yourself a realistic time limit. This may look like: 5 minutes in the morning, 15 minutes during lunch break and 10 minutes before bed. Give this a try for a week and reevaluate. 
  • Seeking Therapy: You know I had to encourage this! Therapy allows you space to ‘lay it all out’. It honors your past, leaves room for grace in the present and helps you hope for a better future. In therapy, you can learn techniques and mechanisms that will help you navigate the world around you. All in all, it gives you an hour out of the week to focus on only you and your needs! 

In summary, please take care of yourself. Self care may come off as selfish, but in a world that is so demanding of time and energy, you have to give yourself grace. Give yourself space to appreciate all that you are accomplishing. Be mindful of your body and how it is feeling. Schedule that check up, make that appointment and get that rest. It is critical. 

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Tara Walls

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